The Isn’t Your Sibling’s State School
Like me, you may have spent some time at a larger, more socially-vibrant school either before or during your time ensconced within the safe confines of the ‘Cac. Just visiting a sibling, good friend, or romantic interest from high school at an institution of higher partying exposes you to a much different social perspective; my brother debauches with regularity at the school recently ranked the #1 party school by Playboy (way to go, Thomas Jefferson!), and—newsflash—the atmosphere there on the weekends is decidedly different.
I myself just entered the ‘Cac after an ill-fated but pretty uproarious year at a school about as large, fun and fratty as Williams isn’t (though the last two aren’t necessarily correlated). In order to meet people here I’ve felt the need to go out at pretty much every opportunity, quickly experiencing the many (four) flavors of parties Williams has to offer as defined by resident party expert at Crammys here.
Though we know you love it anyway (I sure do), there are always social ruts to get through while your ACC bros are having a great time hazing pledges. How does one deal? Here’s a quick-and-dirty list of things that have given me solace in this new environment:
1. Pre-gaming for Snack Bar is fun!
2. …But after 1 AM I don’t like to eat food anyways.
3. I’ll never blow off homework on Thursday night.
4. The weather for our November homecoming tailgate will be wonderful!
5. The law of diminishing returns doesn’t apply.
6. No party hopping means I’ll save money on Bean Boots.
7. Frats are lame but lax bros are kind of cool, I guess.
8. I could be in-season.
9. If the parties were more fun I wouldn’t be this drunk.
10. The grass is always greener on the other flooded soccer field, so suck it up kids and love the one you’re with.